Music

You Don't Have a Food Problem

HAPPY SUNDAY! Guess what? YOU DON'T HAVE A FOOD PROBLEM! Aren't you relieved?!!

You may not be relieved. You may think I don't know what I'm talking about. You may have a list of reasons that prove that I seriously am clueless. That list might include:

  • I eat too much (see, food problem, duh!)
  • I crave sugar and other food that is "bad" for me (again..food = problem! Hello!)
  • I'm overweight and want to lose weight but I still eat too much! (food)
  • I seriously don't know what to eat to make me lose weight. It's a problem (again...food)
  • I am STRESSED about food. I mean--it takes up a lot of my headspace. Like, WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO EAT???! (food)

There's many many more additions to this list but I know you have things to do today so I'll trust that you get the picture. AND. I'm telling you--you don't have a food problem.

Disclaimer: if you're eating total crap all day every day (and by crap I mean highly processed food, fast food, nothing made at home. food laden with additives, little to no fruit or vegetables etc..) then YES. YOU HAVE A FOOD PROBLEM. And you most likely have some health problems, too. And if you don't have health problems now, you will eventually. So to be clear--when I am saying you don't have a food problem this kind of eating is the exception.

For the rest of you--those of you that eat a lot of whole foods, cook at home often, and avoid processed foods as much as possible (except when you don't)--you don't have a food problem! YAY!

What you have is a LIFE problem. Yes. You do. You're obsessing about food instead of obsessing about life. You're not letting joy be your guide. You're seeing all the stuff that isn't working and not noticing all the stuff that's going right. You're also plugged into some really damaging belief paradigms around how you're supposed to LOOK and that alone can cause you to not be living your life as fully and joyfully as you have the right to.

Food is a SYMPTOM. Food covers up stuff for us. It numbs us out. It also keeps us safe (if we have a few extra pounds on we are safe from getting unwanted attention, for example).

If you find yourself being even mildly obsessed with what you eat, you are robbing yourself of joy. And you are also IMMEDIATELY putting yourself into aDEPRIVATION MINDSET because the obsession about food is really about what you can and cannot eat. And once we say, "No more sugar!" all we want is sugar. ALL WE WANT IS SUGAR. I mean, we may be fine for a little bit but then, when we can't take it anymore, we are going to eat the sugar--but not just *some* sugar. We're going to eat A LOT of sugar because, you know, f**k it! I might as well eat a second piece of cake, a third brownie, or whatever it is.

So how do you address this? There's many ways to start FREEING yourself from you "food problem". One of the most important things to do, I believe, is to figure out what you're using food for. What is food standing in as a substitute for in your life?

The way to do that is simply by starting to pay attention. If all of a sudden you find yourself craving sugar, or craving chips, or even just feeling hungry when you know you're not really hungry...slow things down and start to see what was going on in your mind or life the moments before the craving hits. Sometimes this is hard, but keep at it. You'll start to figure it out. (Yes, I know I've said this before but you guys--THIS IS IMPORTANT! I probably repeat this in the future so be prepared.)

Once you start to uncover the stuff you're covering up with food THEN YOU CAN START TO LOOSEN THOSE SHACKLES!

My story (Reader's Digest Version): when I started Vibrant Living I noticed I started "eating emotionally" more often. I couldn't figure out why. I wasn't working in the job that was sucking the life out of me anymore, I was doing what I wanted to do...so why was I overeating? Short version is this: I got a coach and did some deep work and found it it was directly related to an incident when I was 5 years old in which I decided, "If I speak my authentic truth, people yell at me, I upset people, so I need to stay small and hide and never be fully expressive of who I am." Really. I did figure that out and it was AWESOME. Because every time I sat down to write a newsletter, I would CRAVE CEREAL. And then I would eat like three bowls of cereal. You guys. OMG. Can you imagine how crappy I felt afterwards? REALLY CRAPPY. And the WHY I was doing it was because writing my newsletter meant EXPRESSING MY AUTHENTIC SELF and that scared the crap out of me so of course I needed to NUMB OUT! This is the very short version of things. I'm going to write another email telling you more details. But I wanted you to see the underneath the "why"...awareness creates opportunity for action. Getting aware is imperative.

The coach I worked with was trained in the Transformational Coaching Method (which uses NLP and Family Systems work to uncover all this crazy stuff!) and I was blown away and got certified as a Master Transformational Coach as well because I wanted to make sure I could help people change their lives the way mine was changed. That's important for you to know if you're considering working with me!

Okay, Elijah! Let's get ONTO THE JOY! SOUL SONG SUNDAY!!

THIS SONG IS PURE JOY! My friend (and past client!), Randi Berry, suggested sharing this song with all of you and I LOVE IT. It's been called, "...one of the most joyful songs ever recorded."

A note on the lyrics: You may try hard to decipher some of the words in the song--you may even think you know what they are, but they are actually just made up! Michael Glabicki said in an interview that the lyrics aren't supposed to make rational sense. "I was in the process of coming up with lyrics, and it just sounded so good and felt so right that it had a meaning of its own that you couldn't make better by making it a word. So I left it."

RUSTED ROOT--SEND ME ON MY WAY

 

 

HAVE A JOYOUS WEEK!!

Love,

Elijah

"I'm fat and ugly"

I think A LOT about the subject of us loving ourselves. I can honestly say that not a single day goes by when I don't think about it. There's a couple of reasons why. First and foremost, because it took me FOREVER to FINALLY LOVE MYSELF. Man. I spent way to many years walking around under the cloud of not being good enough, pretty enough, thin enough...not enough not enough not enough. ENOUGH ALREADY.

The other reason is that I hear women and men EVERY DAY talk shit about themselves as if it was the most normal thing in the world. And you know what? It is normal. Or maybe I should say, it's the norm.

Just some of the things I've heard:

  • "I'm disgusting."
  • "I hate my body."
  • "I'm repulsive."
  • "I can't stand myself."
  • "I'm a piece of human garbage."
  • "No one will ever love this grossness."

And many many more. I want to state that the above quotes are actual things I've heard people say--both strangers and people that I know and love. It is so heart-breaking to me. I wonder how many of you reading this are thinking, "That's not really any big deal. We all say stuff like that to ourselves. It motivates us."? Are you thinking this isn't a big deal? You might be. For me, it isn't that I didn't think it was a big deal but that I didn't really think about it at all because EVERYONE DID IT. I was the fish that didn't know I lived in water--it was all around me so I truly didn't know any different. But once you start noticing, you can't stop. And once you understand how deeply damaging this is to yourself and the life you want to live (I mean truly stepping into a powerful and juicy life that has you feeling ALIVE) then you'll understand what a big deal this truly is.

I've been there. I have countless journal entries where (no exaggeration) I've just written over and over again, "I'm fat and ugly, I'm fat and ugly..." It crushes me to think of that version of myself, lying in bed writing in her journal in so much pain.

It took me years to climb out of that deep, dark hole, and now I'm determined to pull others up behind me (and do it faster than I did!).

Why? So many reasons why. But one of the biggest is that WE NEED YOU. And when you are lying in bed thinking you're a piece of shit, or even if you're just walking around thinking good things won't happen until you lose 15 pounds, YOU ARE NOT BRINGING YOUR FULL GAME. And seriously--the world needs you to show up powerfully. I believe that all of us, deep inside, want to be in service to the world--make this a better place. We want to know we are making a difference even if it is just in our small corner...if you think that sounds cheesy then 1) yes, I agree, it sounds cheesy but 2) it's dead on. And 3) if you're denying that then you just aren't willing to own that part of you that wants to shine--to truly bring passion and purpose to your life. I get it. It's scary. It can feel daunting. But truthfully, avoiding that, dulling your passions, editing yourself in order to please others and not make waves...oooooooh! THAT IS EXHAUSTING!

So what I'm saying here is that THE FUTURE OF THE WORLD IS AT STAKE. That's how important learning to love yourself is!

This is February. It's the month we associate with love. I am declaring February the LEARN TO LOVE YOURSELF month. Yes, it is f**king hard. And yes, it is totally worth it.

I know you have a lot of questions. The main question is HOW???? HOW DO I LOVE MYSELF??? The mantras don't work! Thinking positive only goes so far! And anyways, I truly am not good enough so come on! I'm not lovable!

I get it. I've been there. And I'm going to help you. This entire month I'm going to talk about this and get you on that path. Because THE TRUE YOU IS WAITING. It's ready to SHINE!

And since it is Soul Song Sunday, we are going to jam to some self love by the breathtaking India Arie. Put this song in your pocket and listen to it every day--it's going to start you down that road to LOVE of SELF.

 

India Arie VIDEO

 

 

 

Sometimes I shave my legs and sometimes I don't
Sometimes I comb my hair and sometimes I won't
Depend of how the wind blows I might even paint my toes
It really just depends on whatever feels good in my soul

I'm not the average girl from your video
And I ain't built like a supermodel
But I learned to love myself unconditionally
Because I am a queen
I not the average girl from your video
My worth is not determined by the price of my clothes
No matter what I'm wearing I will always be
India.Arie

When I look in the mirror and the only one there is me
Every freckle on my face is where it's suppose to be
And I know my creator didn't make no mistakes on me
My feet, my thighs, my lips, my eyes, I'm loving what I see

I'm not the average girl from your video
And I ain't built like a supermodel
But I learned to love myself unconditionally
Because I am a queen
I not the average girl from your video
My worth is not determined by the price of my clothes
No matter what I'm wearing I will always be
India.Arie

Am I less of a lady if I don't wear panty hose
My momma said a lady ain't what she wears but what she knowsâ?¦
But I've drawn the conclusion, it's all an illusion
Confusion's the name of the game
A misconception, a mass deception,
Something gotta change

Now don't be offended this is all my opinion
Ain't nothing that I'm saying law
This is a true confession
Of a life learned lesson
I was sent here to share with y'all
So get in when you fit in
Go on and shine
Clear your mind
Now's the time
Put your salt on the shelf
Go on and love yourself
Cause everything's gonna be alright

I'm not the average girl from your video
And I ain't built like a supermodel
But I learned to love myself unconditionally
Because I am a queen
I not the average girl from your video
My worth is not determined by the price of my clothes
No matter what I'm wearing I will always be
India.Arie

Keep your fancy drink, and your expensive minks
I don't need that to have a good time
Keep your expensive cars and your caviar
All I need is my guitar

Keep your crystal and your pistol
I'd rather have a pretty piece of crystal
Don't need you silicone, I prefer my own
What god gave me is just fine

I'm not the average girl from your video
And I ain't built like a supermodel
But I learned to love myself unconditionally
Because I am a queen
I not the average girl from your video
My worth is not determined by the price of my clothes
No matter what I'm wearing I will always be
India.Arie

When Things are Crappy

HOLD ON!

This is your Soul Song Sunday! Thank you to Jill Overland Rosenweig for sending this song to me! I had never heard of Walk the Earth and THEY ARE AWESOME!!

This is the kind of catchy, uplifting tune that will bring you out of your funk. I like to put it on repeat (only on my earbuds because otherwise I drive my husband crazy)! I love music that LIFTS ME UP!

The video is super cute, too :)

 

If you like this song, let me know!

And if you have a song to suggest for Soul Song Sunday, let me know!

HAVE AN UPLIFTING WEEK!!

Elijah

HOLD ON by Walk the Earth

I never wanted it to break
I thought we'd put it all behind us
Ever since that day
All I wanna do is find us
Now I'm falling down
I'm falling down without you
So I'm calling out
I'm calling out to find you

You gotta hold on to what you got, babe
It ain't always greener on the other side
We ain't rich but we're worth a lot, babe
I wanna see the world with your hand in my hand, you know
Come on I'll love you like that
It ain't always greener on the other side
Come on I'll love you like that
I wanna see the world with your hand in my hand, you know

Even when I make mistakes
You would always bring me higher
We got caught up in our wings
Like the time we had the bonfire
There was no one else, no one else around you
So I'm calling out
I'm calling out to find you

You gotta hold on to what you got, babe
It ain't always greener on the other side
We ain't rich but we're worth a lot, babe
I wanna see the world with your hand in my hand, you know
Come on I'll love you like that
It ain't always greener on the other side
Come on I'll love you like that
I wanna see the world with your hand in my hand, you know
You gotta hold on to what you got, babe
You gotta hold on to what you got, babe

I didn't know just how much I loved you girl
Until you've hurt my heart and destroyed my world
When we're apart I'm a perm without a curl
'Cause ever since we started you've been an ocean to my pearl
You and I together 'till dove all protects us
Making much sense as a love between fascists
But we'll be long time rocking great nine classes
I know we'll be together till this life passes

You gotta hold on to what you got, babe
It ain't always greener on the other side
We ain't rich but we're worth a lot, babe
I wanna see the world again in my mind you know
Come on I'll love you like that
It ain't always greener on the other side
Come on I'll love you like that
I wanna see the world again in my mind you know
You gotta hold on to what you got, babe
It ain't always greener on the other side
We ain't rich but we're worth a lot, babe
I wanna see the world again in my mind you know
Come on I'll love you like that
It ain't always greener on the other side
Come on I'll love you like that
I wanna see the world again in my mind you know

I love you, love you, love you like that
And I watched you walk away
I love you, love you, love you like that
Never wanted it to break
I love you, love you, love you like that
And I watched you walk away
I love you, love you, love you like that
Never wanted it to break

I'm Obsessed with this Woman!

Happy Sunday! This is Soul Song Sunday! I'm so excited to share this with you!

Last week I stumbled across this woman--Nina Grae--and from the moment I started reading her website I knew she was something really unique in the world!

Her latest album is called, THE REMEDY and it's music is PRESCRIPTIVE! Meaning she has each song written to ease an ailment. For example (from her website):

IF YOU OR SOMEONE YOU KNOW IS SUFFERING FROM:

  • HEARTBREAK

  • A BREAKUP OR

  • GENERAL LOVELESS-NESS

PLEASE LISTEN TO OR SEND AN INVITATION TO DOWNLOAD

PHONECALL*

PLAY AT LEAST 2X DAILY

ONCE IN THE MORNING AND ONCE BEFORE BED WITH CLOSED EYES AND AN OPEN HEART.

*Side-effects may include hopefulness, forgiveness of self and others, expression and release of buried emotion, renewed sense of inner-strength.

HOW AWESOME IS THAT???? Each song on the album is a prescription for something :)

Music is so powerful--it has the power to shift your perspective, your mood, your story, your life. As my best friend, Lisa Skye's dad, Hank always said, "The music will set you free."

Today I'm going to share a song to get you pumped for STANDING UP and SPEAKING UP for what is RIGHT and GOOD. It is called, LEGACY. Check is out:

 

 

Legacy by Nina Grae

Are you looking to be entertained?
I don't know if I can help today.
Too many questions on my heart and on my brain
No I don’t want to just entertain you

Are you looking for distraction?
I mean if that’s your course of action
Don’t get me wrong there is a time and place for fun
But I ain’t looking to distract no one

Because there’s change brewing
No longer is it deep beneath the surface
The way this train’s moving
It’s forcing us to think about our purpose

I’m not scared to sing about revolution
My soul won’t rest until we find solution
It might take all day and night or the rest of our lives
But it’s worth a try

Because a few years our bodies return to the earth
Our bones and blood will become one with the dirt
And I don’t know about you but I want my moves to matter
So the young souls know that love is all we were after

What do you stand for?
What brings you to your knees?
What do you live for?
What are you dying to see?
What did you come here for?
And what will you leave?
When you’re gone what lives on as your legacy?

When you’re gone what lives on as your legacy?

Repeat

I hope you feel INSPIRED and READY to get out there and be kind, be caring, look people in the eyes, smile, reach out, stand up, speak up...let's do this!

Love love love,

Elijah